Intellect, intuition and emotion: how they work together for an authentic life

The connection between healing from loss and developing your intuition may not seem to exist at first glance. Let alone developing your mediumship abilities to connect with loved ones in Spirit.

Yet these are the things I teach and they’re incredibly and beautifully connected.

The truth is, your heart, head and higher self are meant to work together.

They used to. It’s your birthright.

Kids are connected to their intuition

When my now-teenage son was a newborn, I remember gazing into his eyes and being wowed by the ancient wisdom I saw within them. He was just days old, fresh from the womb, totally innocent and yet as wise as an old man. He was still connected to Spirit and to all that is. (Unless he was hungry, then he was connected to me.)

As a child, he stayed largely connected. My mum died when he was 6. For a couple of years afterward, as he’d sit in the tub for his nightly bath, he’d often tell me he could see her and our cat, Hobbes, who also died that year, as sparkling orbs of light around me.

“Nanny is hugging you,” he’d say, while he was playing with suds. “Hobbes is here, too.”

As he’s gotten older, he’s less connected to that world, and more connected to school, friends and video games. He’s fortunate that I’ve taught him, and will continue to encourage my kids, to always listen to himself, to trust himself and to follow his heart and intuition.

That’s an unusual message, though.

You learned to stop trusting your heart and higher self

For most of us, as we grow up we’re told things like, “There’s no such thing as ghosts.” That was me at age 4 when I saw my late half-brother in Spirit. He died when I was 2. I quickly learned not to tell anyone about my abilities.

This can easily cut you off from your innate connection to your intuition and higher self.

Or you’re told things like, “Think it through. Be rational.” You’re taught to make pro and con lists. Or you might hear, “If you’re going to cry, I’ll give you something to cry about.”

You likely learned that you’re supposed to make practical career choices. That other people don’t want to hear your pain. That if you’re going to be upset, you should go and do it on your own.

This cuts you off from your connection to your heart.

Without your heart or intuition, all you’ve got is your brain

Once you’re taught to shut down your intuition and also to stop trusting and listening to your heart what are you left with?

You’re left with your intellect.

Your brain is a wonderful thing. It’s capable of so much. It’s got processing speeds and neural connections that would be the envy of other living species if they experienced such a thing.

But it shouldn’t have to do all the work alone, without the support of your heart or intuition.

The intellect doesn’t work well alone. You already know this.

You know that you can’t think your way out of grief. You’ve already tried.

You know you can’t make decisions for your heart with your head, with what makes logical or practical sense. That’s the heart’s work.

Your brain might spin and spin, keeping you awake at night, but it can’t solve the problems of intuition or emotion.

You know that when you hear that small inner voice, or maybe get the equivalent of a spiritual 2×4, and you ignore it, it’s a bad idea. You mostly know this in hindsight. “I knew I should have listened to my gut!” Yeah, I’ve been there, too.

You’re supposed to live connected to your heart, head and higher self.

Heart, head and higher self are meant to work together

All three work together beautifully. Whether that’s taking in information from your intuition and using your intellect to make it come alive in your life. Or processing your past hurts through your heart center, while using your head to gain awareness and see the patterns of where your learned behaviors and beliefs came from on the first place.

Learning to heal from your losses, allows your heart to do its emotional work. This healing then means you can hear what your heart has to say and make decisions that are emotionally healthy.

It also means you’re in the place you need to be to learn to hear, trust and follow your intuition.

When you can allow yourself to notice and recognize your intuitive thoughts and feelings, and then trust yourself to act on them, in a healthy partnership with your intellect, synchronicity begins to happen in your life.

When all three are working together, wonderful things happen.

That’s what I do. I help you heal your heart, so you can trust your connection with your higher self, and become friends with yourself. This friendliness means you’re always on your side, you’ve got your back, and you get to live life on the terms that most matter to you.

Originally published at on June 5, 2019.



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JY Bartlett

JY Bartlett


Pronouns: they/them. Award-winning writer, author and teacher on overcoming adversity and learning to trust yourself.